Cream Cheese Frosting

Hi. I was tasked to make cupcakes for my friend’s birthday recently. The cake part was easy – Pillsbury Moist Supreme Golden Butter. That’s the stuff. The real challenge was making the frosting or the icing or whatever it’s called. I call it awesome. I found a recipe from Martha Stewart that Georgetown Cupcakes supposedly uses. I say supposedly because there’s no way it’s right.

Anyway, Georgetown Cupcakes is an absurdly over-priced cupcake joint in DC. My main beef is not that it’s too expensive – I realized through research that they use super high-quality ingredients and, hey, if there’s the demand then that’s capitalism at work. It’s the actual price that bothers me. $2.75 before tax… $3.03 after tax! That means you’re gonna get 97 cents in coinage if you’re a baller and rolling with paper cash. Why not just decrease the price a few cents – it would be better for everyone.

Back to the recipe. This is an absurdly good frosting and it’s absurdly easy to make.

4 tbsp butter (room temperature)

6 oz cream cheese (room temperature)

2.5 cups powdered or confectioners sugar

1/4 tsp vanilla extract

Just put together and play some electric mixation by a tribe called quest. Yeah, bad joke. The only thing I would mention is you should start with 2 cups sugar and adjust if you want it sweeter. The Georgetown recipe calls for 4 cups. That’s just too much Martha Stewart. Use to cover any sort of baked good, fruit (not bananas though, it just doesn’t work right) or your finger. Enjoy!

Le Blog Eleven Pack: Best Movies of the Decade

Well, hola, intrepid reader and welcome to the finest end-of-decade review within the known confines of our galaxy. You won’t find any over-rated, sappy Michel Gondry junk here. This is for real men who sail frigid waters in icy rain and wrestle with herds of buffalo on the savage plains of the West. This is also for all the pretty ladies who happen on by. Enchanté.

This is a very special edition of Le Blog’s Best. I took the usual four and made it eleven because I’m covering an entire decade and that’s how I play. This was rather a difficult list to put together because, honestly, the decade didn’t produce many outstanding films. Thanks to the central limit theorem, there were some very good ones but make a quick comparison to the 1990s and you’ll see that the quality was a tad lacking.

Anyway, my choice as the best film isn’t too surprising for me. I’m not throwing any curve balls here. I view cinema, and really all art, primarily as entertainment. Perhaps sometimes it reaches beyond that but the occasion for such “serious” art comes about quite infrequently. If you want “meaning” and “transcendence” go read the news, study history or watch documentaries. I want my movies to have explosions and big guns.

Now that I’ve laid down the law for all the pretentious blowhards (this has to be the worst best-of-decade list around) let’s get down to some rock and some roll. The following films are in strictly alphabetical order except for the number one. I’m rather proud of this list. I’ve scoured the Internet and found no other list that puts my number one near their top and a few other selections are quite esoteric as well. That’s what makes lists so great. No one agrees on them. There’s no accounting for taste. But my taste is the best.

Children of Men (2006)

Is this the modern-day Blade Runner? It’s a smart science fiction with some social commentary but thankfully there is no preaching. At its heart, this is nothing more than an exciting, breakneck chase movie.

City of God (2002)

Enjoying this movie is like eating meat. Yeah I know what happens to those animals but damn I can’t deny the lure of a juicy steak. Likewise I can’t deny the entertainment value in a sprawling crime epic even though it takes advantage of despondent environments and tragic characters. This isn’t some glorified gangster flick. But it does protect us from some uncomfortable realities by wrapping the film in some bubble gum. Hey, if the director wanted it any other way he would have made a documentary.

Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

This visually arresting film redefined special effects and was entertaining enough to keep me watching for three hours multiple times. I thought the second and third films dabbled too much in tedium but this is one of the defining movies of our generation. It’s odd that people keep going on about Avatar’s technical achievements when they are no better than the Lord of the Rings movies… which have been out for at least seven years.

Head-On

A gritty and raw exploration of lives outside the mainstream. The film is about two Turks in Germany and their strange relationship. I’m not really sure what other adjectives to use here but I really like the movie and have watched it several times. The director Fatih Akin made my Best Movies I Watched in 2009 list so he’s definitely on my okay list.

The Incredibles (2004)

Is social commentary important when deciding the value of a movie? Nah… are you joking me? Wall-E is the Pixar movie of choice for most end-of-decade lists and it’s a charming, entertaining film. But it’s given added value because it is a statement on the future of our planet. Whatever. The Incredibles is the best animated film of the decade. Just an exciting superhero romp, pure fun.

Kill Bill Part 1 (2003)

I could care less what a director thinks of their own work and how it should be interpreted. Meaning, I don’t care if Tarantino wanted Kill Bill to be one continuous movie. The second part stinks. It’s boring. There’s too much needless talking and its dull even for the master of dialogue. The first part is just amazing and endlessly rewatchable.

Requiem for a Dream (2000)

I’ve been going through some best movies of the decade lists to see what other people have selected and to see if I have forgotten anything. None of them have Requiem for a Dream. Surprising considering Darren Aronofsky is such a darling of the critic brigade. This is the most gut-wrenching, engaging drama of the decade. Yeah, it uses a lot of gimmicks but it also was the first to use those gimmicks. I remember legendary Virginian Pilot (my local paper at the time) critic Mal Vincent giving this one a half-star review when it came out. I guess it can be polarizing film and I magnetize to the positive end.

United 93 (2006)

Gripping. If there was one movie this decade that I couldn’t tear my eyes away from it was this one. I doubt I’ll ever watch this film again but it’s memorable enough to break my multiple rewatchings rule. Easily the best movie about the war on terrorism.

Wonder Boys (2000)

I absolutely love this movie. I have as many laugh-out-loud moments from this movie as I do from any movie (I’m usually a laugh-on-the-inside type of guy). I always end up forgetting about it for a while and when I rediscover it I’m astounded I ever forgot about it in the first place.

Zoolander (2001)

Will Ferrell step aside. Judd Apatow minions step aside. Whoever else I’m forgetting step aside. The comedy maestro of the decade is Ben Stiller. The guy does over-the-top satire like no one else (he also does mainstream comedy better than anyone too). Zoolander might not be everyone’s cup of tea and it’s pure slapstick and silliness but it was my personal standard bearer for most laugh-out-loud moments this decade.

The Best Movie of the Decade

The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)

This is why I watch movies. Movies don’t have to mean anything. Movies don’t even need a good plot (or any plot). Is film art… or is it entertainment? Who cares? All of the Bourne films are revolutionary. They are required watching for the popcorn-popping, movie-theater-loving, escapist in all of us. And the third one is the finest of the lot. It’s like Mario. The first one blows up on to the scene and redefines a genre. The second one is different and underrated but still delivers the action. The third pulls the coup d’etat – that’s right, this is government-toppling stuff. The movie that all action movies in the future will be measured against. The only movie this decade I saw twice in the theater. You want to choose something that has meaning, that has a message? Fine, that’s your choice. Me, I’m picking the best entertainment of the decade as my best movie of the decade.

Enchanté

Le Blog Fourplay: The best books I read in 2009

I don’t have much of an introduction for this the latest segment of the award-winning top four (now known as the fourplay, if you hadn’t noticed). I chose these four from the thirty-odd books I consumed in 2009 – most of them novels. In no particular order and without further preamble, let the dogs loose.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson (2005 Sweden/2008 US)

The hype machine built this one up and I finally took the bait. No, the hype wasn’t from Oprah or some literary prize and I’m not actually sure how much hype there actually was but I heard a lot of buzz in different places… so yeah. Anyway, the novel started out slow and my cynical side (I do have a non-cynical side too) sneered in disgust. Perseverance pays off. Not too long into the story, things take off and don’t stop for 400+ pages. There is nothing literary about this work. It’s an old-fashioned barnstormer of a mystery/thriller from a writer who understood pacing and hooking the reader. Popular fiction at its best.

The Case of Comrade Tulayev by Victor Serge (1951)

I blogged about this book a while ago. It’s a slow, dense but ultimately rewarding piece of work that shows how literature and art can sometimes transcend entertainment and become a serious pursuit.

Brilliant Orange by David Winner (2001)

This year I began to seriously consume books on soccer. For a while I had a hard time justifying spending my time reading about sport but that was just silly. Lesson learned, kids: just do what you like. I like soccer so I’ll read books about soccer. Brilliant Orange had been on my radar for a while and boy am I glad I got around to reading it. It’s an account of the Netherlands. Not just of football in the Netherlands but also of Dutch culture and the Dutch psyche. It’s a fascinating look into how soccer in the Netherlands reflects the unique culture and personalities of the country.

The Brief, Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz (2007)

The story of Oscar Wao and the fuku that afflicts his family jumps across time and space with little regard for rules and polity. This book has the best, most alive characters of anything I read in 2009 and the narrative is non-stop keep-reading material. Even the liberal sprinkling of Spanish (a glossary would have helped) or the lengthy footnotes on Dominican history can’t stop the flow and the page-turning.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stieg Larsson (2005 Sweden/2008 US)

The hype machine built this one up and I finally took the bait. No, the hype wasn’t from Oprah or some literary prize and I’m not actually sure how much hype there actually was but I heard a lot of buzz in different places… so yeah. Anyway, the novel started out slow and my cynical side (I do have a non-cynical side too) sneered in disgust. Perseverance pays off. Not too long into the story, things take off and don’t stop for 400+ pages. There is nothing literary about this work. It’s an old-fashioned barnstormer of a mystery novel from a writer who understood pacing and hooking the reader. Popular fiction at its best.

The Case of Comrade Tulayev by Victor Serge (1951)

I blogged about this book a while ago. It’s a slow, dense but ultimately rewarding piece of work that helps understand how literature and art can sometimes transcend entertainment.

Brilliant Orange by David Winner (2001)

If nothing else, globalization has made it easier for me to consumer soccer. Ten years ago I struggled to find sources for Turkish soccer scores. Now I watch the games live (albeit from pirated broadcasts). Also where previously it was difficult to get your hands on soccer books published in Europe, these days most of them are readily available. Brilliant Orange was on my radar for a while and boy am I glad I got around to reading it. It’s an account of the Netherlands. Not just of Dutch football but also of Dutch culture and the Dutch psyche. It’s a fascinating look into how soccer in the Netherlands reflects the unique culture and personalities in the country.

The Brief, Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz (2007)

The story of Oscar Wao and the fuku that afflicts his family jumps across time and space with little regard for rules and polity. The success of this novel arises from the vibrant characters and the blistering pace of the narrative. Even the liberal sprinkling of Spanish (a glossary would have helped) or the lengthy footnotes on Dominican history can’t stop the flow and the page-turning.

Bruno

Utterly shameless and offensive, at times uncomfortably so. But that’s a good thing. Waiting to see what he’ll do next is alone worth the price of admission. In a way it is revolutionary – edge-of-your-seat comedy, perhaps the first film of that kind. The fact that the movie is absolutely hilarious is almost beyond the point.

Le Blog Fourplay: Best movies I saw for the first time in 2009

Yeah, I know, everyone else has done their 2009 and decade lists. Whatever. I’m a bit lazier and better than they are.

I watch a lot of movies but not a lot of new movies, which is why this is not a best of 2009 list. I was going through some effects at my parents’ place recently and found some old ticket stubs. Matinee movies for five dollars! Those were the days. It’s not like inflation has increased that much in ten years but ticket prices have almost doubled. Cinemas are expensive and, really, there’s no reason to see a talkie or a comedy in the theatre.

Anyway, on to my top four movies I saw in 2009. As always, this is my opinion based on what I like and my tastes and conventional wisdom and critics be damned.

Edge of Heaven

Fatih Akin’s latest film has what can be described as a plot that weaves patterns across characters and places but doesn’t necessarily meet in ways you expect. As in Akin’s wonderful Head-On, the story travels between Germany and Turkey. The emotional impact and sheer rawness isn’t the same but it’s a mesmerizing film with interesting characters that eschews Hollywood conventions.

The Lives of Others

I caught this one early in the year. I’ve seen it on many best-of-the-decade lists so it’s definitely not under the radar. It’s also a fairly slow, deliberate drama, which in general is like chlamydia for me – avoid at all costs. But it’s one of those deliberate dramas that’s utterly engrossing as it portrays the drab misery of living in East Germany without hitting you over the head with it.

District 9

The only movie that came out this year to make the list. OK so I didn’t see too many films that came out this year but I caught this one in the theater and it was excellent. Just pure popcorn fun. Yeah, Star Trek was entertaining too but District 9 was more inventive and more visceral. It was the most fun I’ve had watching a movie this year.

King of Kong

What? A documentary about Donkey Kong? What what? I came into this one with fairly low expectations and was blown away. It’s a fascinating peek into a subculture that has the characters and passion and conspiracy theories that mirror those of any professional competition. It has a bit of that David-versus-Goliath or maybe a good-versus-evil feel and a real human interest story that rarely indulges in the saccharine. Simply a great feature documentary.

Runners-Up

Let the Right One In – A vampire film from Sweden that grew and grew on me.

Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead – A minor masterpiece. The closest one to breaking into the above list.

We Own the Night – Wonderfully acted, atmospheric crime film.

13 Tzameti – Didn’t really have a chance to make my list but an incredibly original and taut independent flick that has a few of the most suspenseful scenes I’ve seen in some time.

Great Bathroom Reading

The Internet is great but sometimes you don’t want to sit in front of a screen reading a long article. That’s what the bathroom is for. Since it’s uncomfortable to sit in the bathroom with a laptop I would recommend you print these articles out and enjoy reading the old fashion way. Or read them on public transportation. Or wherever you’d like.

City of Fear by William Langewiesche, Vanity Fair, April 2007

Fascinating piece about the criminal network in Sao Paolo’s prisons. This guy Langewiesche has some great pieces for Vanity Fair. Check out his archive here. I really liked his article on Somalian Pirates and his account of Moloud Sihali.

Double Blind by Matthew Teague, The Atlantic, April 2006

The subheader calls it “The untold story of how British intelligence infiltrated and undermined the IRA.” A real-life spy story just as good or better than fiction – as most real-life spy stories are.

Origin of a Species: How a T. Rex Femur Sparked a Scientific Smackdown by Evan Ratliff, Wired, July 2009

Well, the title pretty much explains what the article is about. An interesting insight into how scientific breakthroughs are never as straightforward as the media would have you believe.

Offensive Play by Malcolm Gladwell, New Yorker, October 2009

Malcolm Gladwell is kind of a hot commodity as far as nonfiction writing is concerned. I’ve been making my way through The Tipping Point, a book with an interesting though fairly obvious topic that, unfortunately, is a bit repetitive. Gladwell’s style lends itself much better to shorter pieces like this one that compares dogfighting to football.

The Widow and the Oligarchs by Suzanna Andrews, Vanity Fair, October 2009

Vanity Fair is an excellent source for excellent articles. This one doesn’t have the best of writing but who needs to be a good writer when the story is so remarkable. Badri Patarkatsishvilli, the richest man in Georgia (the one on the other side of the world), dies and all hell breaks loose over his estate. Forged wills, American lawyers in a Belarussian prison, and secrete marriages.

The forgotten story of… Danish Dynamite by Rob Smyth and Lars Eriksen, Guardian Online, October 2009

If you’re a fan of soccer this is a must-read but even if you’re not it’s an interesting piece about one of the greatest international sides in football history… and it was from the tiny country of Denmark. By the by, I’m not a huge fan of the Guardian’s English football coverage but their European football bloggers are wonderful and they have a couple of great regular features, like Joy of Six.

The Song Decoders by Rob Walker, New York Times Magazine, October 2009

A piece about what goes on behind the scenes at Pandora, the popular and innovative online radio site that uses a Music Genome to recommend new music.

The Snatchback by Nadya Labi, The Atlantic, November 2009

Ride shotgun with a guy who re-kidnaps kids who’ve been taken away from legitimate parents. Custody battles across international borders.

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

It’s difficult to overcome high expectations. But truth be told, I didn’t have high expectations for this film. After all, I knew it was at heart a romance movie and I’m not really that interested in romances. I had trouble paying attention during this movie and it was the silliest things that made me lose my interest. Ultimately forgettable and I don’t really understand what everyone sees in this movie.

I do remember Kirsten Dunst quoting Nietszche and Alexander Pope kind of randomly. That was weird.

Avatar

I feel like just shrugging my shoulders at this movie. It’s pretty much like watching a really cool video game – but not getting to play. The story is pretty much what you would expect from a video game. The guy in the main role reminds me of one of those crappy video game voice actors. The graphics, though, are really neat.

A lot of people are touting this as revolutionary? Really? The special effects in the Lord of the Rings movies are much better. The 3-D is cool at times but a little gimmicky – more suited to movies at the Smithsonian about dinosaurs. The only thing revolutionary is how much it cost to make. Perhaps they should have paid for better actors instead of Giovanni Ribisi and the guy from Dodgeball. The main bad guy, at least, is bad-ass and suitably hate-able.

Do I regret seeing this in the theater? Despite it being 2.5 hours and its ticket costing more than already inflated theater prices? No, not really. It’s a fun movie at times but it’s hard to avoid all the hype that came with it. As usual, it doesn’t measure up. It doesn’t even come close. I had a lot more fun watching Star Trek and District 9 in the theaters. So… even though this is a movie that panders as a crowd-pleasing popcorn-popper and I’m the perfect audience but all I can say is, eh, whatever.

The Orphanage (El Orfanato)

Genuinely creepy movie with some hardcore goosebump moments.

4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days

An intense movie about a girl who helps her roommate get an abortion in Communist-era Romania. The atmosphere is thick. You can just taste that crumbling, decrepit hopelessness of the era. The main girl is brilliant in her role, the girl getting the abortion is annoyingly stupid and the abortion doctor is, well, geez, he’s really complex for a secondary character. What’s fascinating about the film is how the scenes are so mundane but the abortion lends them extraordinary drama. It’s one of those foreign films that put saccharine Hollywood dramas to shame.